Reality Check

What a day today has been!! I woke up this morning to enjoy a few hours with my sweet family before spending the day at church for a Women's Conference. You know how you sign up for something that you know God is calling you to (and you usually hear Him tell you to sign up in your vulnerable part of the day..hehehe...He's so good!) but then you start coming up with excuses as to why you don't want to go - I won't know anyone but my mother-in-law who I invited. I spend every work day away from my child and now I am going to spend Saturday away from her too? I am already going to be at the church ALL DAY Sunday, so do I need to go today??

If you don't know what I am talking about then you must be a SAINT and I need to meet you!! Hehe! After I finally got out of the door and to my car, I realized very quickly that Satan was taking hold of me. I realized this just before I went to crank my car and nothing happened. WHAT? This is supposed to be the "good car". Matt's truck is supposed to be the one with issues, not mine! So my loving husband informed me that I must have done something to run my battery down, jumped my car, and off I went.

I attened the Women's Conference and I am soooo glad that I went (more on that in a later blog). After the conference, I went out to my car and you guessed it...it wouldn't crank. I immediately began calling family - husband, father, mother, father-in-law, and brother-in-law. I was lucky that my brother-in-law happened to be working at the car dealership right across the street. He came over, jumped my car and even helped me get a great deal on a battery and replaced it for me.

Through all of this drama, I began getting phone calls from current guests in my shelter and ones that had graduated the program. Keep in mind, my phone had only rung once all day and now it was going crazy! Really??? Don't they know I am in the middle of my own crisis! I can't solve your problems right now; I am having a hard enough time as it is solving my problem. Can't I just dwell in self pity for a little longer??

After solving their problems and mine, I was back on the road to see my sweet family. But since being home, I have not been able to shake a strange feeling inside of me. I was ignoring it for a while until I was having a semi-quiet time with God while doing laundry (you see for me, God talks LOUDLY during the time I am folding laundry. Weird...I know. I have a hard time being still and He speaks when I am doing the most mundane task I can think of).

He was reminding me of one of the phone conversations I was having while in the dealership services department. You see, one of my past clients was stranded in Atlanta and her car wouldn't start (sound familiar?). She didn't know of anyone to call, so she called me. She had no help close by. She had no family to call. She called the only person that had helped in the past.

I have EVERYTHING  I need. I had everything that I needed today. I had TONS of people to call that would help (or at least tons that I thought would help). I had family member that took care of everything. I had a place for my child to sleep tonight. I had a support system that loves me unconditionally. And my list does go on and on....

I have to say that it was a humbling experience tonight to be reminded how selfish I can be. Some peple will read this and just think this was coincidence. I don't believe in that. God knew what I needed to see and sometimes (let's be honest...most times) it takes BIG  things to make us listen. To make us stop and listen.

Even after a day spent at the church learning some amazing things about myself and my relationship with Christ, I walked out and in that parking lot I reverted back to my human ways. It only takes a second for Satan to grab hold! I am so thankful that I serve a God that is in the teaching business and that He never gives up on me even when I fail test after test.