Reality Check

What a day today has been!! I woke up this morning to enjoy a few hours with my sweet family before spending the day at church for a Women's Conference. You know how you sign up for something that you know God is calling you to (and you usually hear Him tell you to sign up in your vulnerable part of the day..hehehe...He's so good!) but then you start coming up with excuses as to why you don't want to go - I won't know anyone but my mother-in-law who I invited. I spend every work day away from my child and now I am going to spend Saturday away from her too? I am already going to be at the church ALL DAY Sunday, so do I need to go today??

If you don't know what I am talking about then you must be a SAINT and I need to meet you!! Hehe! After I finally got out of the door and to my car, I realized very quickly that Satan was taking hold of me. I realized this just before I went to crank my car and nothing happened. WHAT? This is supposed to be the "good car". Matt's truck is supposed to be the one with issues, not mine! So my loving husband informed me that I must have done something to run my battery down, jumped my car, and off I went.

I attened the Women's Conference and I am soooo glad that I went (more on that in a later blog). After the conference, I went out to my car and you guessed it...it wouldn't crank. I immediately began calling family - husband, father, mother, father-in-law, and brother-in-law. I was lucky that my brother-in-law happened to be working at the car dealership right across the street. He came over, jumped my car and even helped me get a great deal on a battery and replaced it for me.

Through all of this drama, I began getting phone calls from current guests in my shelter and ones that had graduated the program. Keep in mind, my phone had only rung once all day and now it was going crazy! Really??? Don't they know I am in the middle of my own crisis! I can't solve your problems right now; I am having a hard enough time as it is solving my problem. Can't I just dwell in self pity for a little longer??

After solving their problems and mine, I was back on the road to see my sweet family. But since being home, I have not been able to shake a strange feeling inside of me. I was ignoring it for a while until I was having a semi-quiet time with God while doing laundry (you see for me, God talks LOUDLY during the time I am folding laundry. Weird...I know. I have a hard time being still and He speaks when I am doing the most mundane task I can think of).

He was reminding me of one of the phone conversations I was having while in the dealership services department. You see, one of my past clients was stranded in Atlanta and her car wouldn't start (sound familiar?). She didn't know of anyone to call, so she called me. She had no help close by. She had no family to call. She called the only person that had helped in the past.

I have EVERYTHING  I need. I had everything that I needed today. I had TONS of people to call that would help (or at least tons that I thought would help). I had family member that took care of everything. I had a place for my child to sleep tonight. I had a support system that loves me unconditionally. And my list does go on and on....

I have to say that it was a humbling experience tonight to be reminded how selfish I can be. Some peple will read this and just think this was coincidence. I don't believe in that. God knew what I needed to see and sometimes (let's be honest...most times) it takes BIG  things to make us listen. To make us stop and listen.

Even after a day spent at the church learning some amazing things about myself and my relationship with Christ, I walked out and in that parking lot I reverted back to my human ways. It only takes a second for Satan to grab hold! I am so thankful that I serve a God that is in the teaching business and that He never gives up on me even when I fail test after test.

Blessings

My sweet mentor reminded me yesterday just how blessed I am. This morning, I used my quiet time to write out all of the people that have been placed in my life that are absolute blessings to me. I was shocked at how long my list was! It was a great reminder that God is in control of everything...even the people who I come into contact with.

Have you thought about this? Have you thought about why people are in your life? Even the ones you really don't like? Could those people that you really don't like be blessings in your life and you are missing it?

I love the conversation that God has with Abraham (well...his name is Abram at this point of the story). In Genesis 12:1-3

The Lord had said to Abram, "Leave your country, your people and your father's household and go to the land I will show you.

"I will make you into a great nation
and I will bless you;
I will make your  name great,
and you will be a blessing.
I will bless those who bless you,
and whoever curses you I will curse;
and all peoples on earth
will be blessed through you."

 He is telling Abram to go and be a blessing because God is blessing him. Isn't He telling us the same thing? "Sarah, I have blessed you so much. I have even allowed you to see a glimpse into my many blessings. But...I didn't bless you so that you could keep it all to yourself. Rather, I want you to be a blessing to others." WOW!!!!

I didn't do anything to deserve the many blessings in my life. Which means that I don't deserve to keep them all to myself.

The other part of this scripture hits me hard. What is God telling me that I need to leave so that I can fully follow Him? So that I can be blessed in order to be a blessing? Is it my pride, my anger, my judgmental self (and the list does go on and on). What is it for you? What is stopping you from following God all the way???

If everyone wrote out all of their blessings (even when...especially when...they are going through the storms of this life) then made it a daily goal not only to thank God for those blessings but in return be a blessing to others...think of how different our world would be. One of my other sweet mentors told me that you can't change THE world but you can change YOUR world. It starts with you!!

Of course I couldn't write this blog without hearing the sweet voice of Laura Story singing:

We pray for blessings
We pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering
All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things

'Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise
We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
And we cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt Your goodness, we doubt Your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
All the while, You hear each desperate plea
As long that we have faith to believe

'Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
And what if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know that pain reminds this heart
That this is not, this is not our home
It's not our home
'Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
And what if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can’t satisfy
And what if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are Your mercies in disguise



I encourage you to look for all the blessing in your life. I love that this song reminds us that sometimes the blessings we have in our life are often masked because they aren't what we asked for. But don't we worship a God who knows EXACTLY what we need and still blesses us with more than we deserve??